I Am Entirely Normal

(I work too much. For all of you NOT reading this, pardon my absense.)

In case anyone was wondering, YES, it is entirely normal to:

• Tell your friend you have misplaced a sex toy (or three)...
• And to text said friend a picture of them when you find them in a shoebox
• Collect a giant slug in a pickle jar in order to give it to a (different) friend...
• And to have a friend who is excited to receive a giant slug in a pickle jar
• Eat an entire pound of baby carrots in the space of half an hour
• And to wait until you shit orange in order to time your digestive system
• Have multiple unopened cans of "Pussy" energy drink in your room
• And to consider these cans decorative objects worthy of display

In conclusion, I am entirely normal.  

Suck it.